i wanna be yours

luhuke:

All Of The Stars - Michael Clifford
word count: 2254

|| And I know these scars will bleed but both of our hearts believe ||
The night had turned black as a lonely boy wandered down the deserted street at an unholy hour, the rain turning his dyed hair several shades darker and making his tight jeans feel like leggings against his cold skin. His hands were tucked away deep inside the pockets of his trench coat as he swayed back and forth on his unsteady feet, the alcohol he’d consumed this night heavily effecting his coordination as he bumped into a lamppost. A high-pitched fit of giggles left his mouth as he pointed up at the sky, hiccupping and slurring drunken words as he tried to form proper sentences.
“Y-you” hiccup, “y-you up there!” hiccup, “, stop laughing a-at me!” another hiccup, “I-I can hea-hear you laughing!”  The giggling boy now had a confused expression on his face as his hands held onto the lamppost, his head resting against the cold metal as his eyes were still looking upwards. How could he hear her laugh? How could she just laugh at him? Why didn’t she help him with walking home? How could she leave him standing there, leaning against a damned lamppost for God’s sake.
“I-I know,” his legs had given out on him, his body now slowly sliding down the length of the lamppost as he shouted some more slurring words, the rain blurring his already blurred vision even more, “you’re up there, missy! Just help m-me out!”
But as the sudden realisation hit him that she wasn’t up there, like how he’d thought, tears started to roll down his cheeks as fast as the rain that was pouring down from the sky. The stinging in his chest distracted him from the unpleasant feeling of his wet clothes sticking to his body as he hit the pavement with his flat hand, only hurting himself while doing so. His other hand gripped onto the wet material of his coat as he yelled angry, drunken words up at the sky. Angry words of how she’d left him alone on this miserable world, where people were cruel and obscure.
And only other wanderers who were out at this time of night were able to hear his screams, his frustrated shouting, but he didn’t care.
Lately he’d found it hard to show any interest in the most common things like what other people would think of what he did, because the day his love passed away; she had taken his ability to care about anything with her.
|| I sang a lullaby by the waterside and knew if you were here, I’d sing to you ||

The lonely boy had been sitting next to the little pond since the moment the sun had risen, his fingers walking over the neck of his guitar, fingertips strumming over the strings as he softly muttered some made up words. The spot by the waterside had become his getaway place, where he could step away from all the publicity and chaos for just a few hours until his head was cleared up again.
The soft tones of his voice filled the air as he started to sing a little louder, his head nodding along to the chords he played as he tried to remember the lyrics he’d made up last time he was here, his mind digging up memories of the last day they spend together at this place to give him some more inspiration.
Her head was placed on his chest as she laid on her stomach, listening to the beating of his heart with her eyes closed while she drew random patterns on his chest.
“It tickles.” Michael’s voice was hoarse, due to the lack of speaking, as he ran his fingers through his girlfriend’s long hair. The couple had been quiet the entire time they’d been here, both of them listening to the sound of water hitting the waterside and the birds chirping several metres above them.
“I know,” was her simple response. She stopped the movement of her hand and laid it flat on his chest, next to her head as she opened her eyes, squeezing them shut once again because of the bright sunlight.
“No don’t stop, it feels nice.” Michael had closed his eyes by now as the girl pushed herself up on her elbows.
“It tickles but don’t stop because it feels nice and I’m Michael Clifford so do as I say.” She tried to mimic his voice as she let her hair fall into his face, her face several centimetres above his as Michael opened his eyes again. Within seconds he had pushed her over and was on top of her, his strong hands pinning down her small ones next to her body.
“You’ve got a problem with that, missy?” A grin was spread across his face as he pressed his lips to the spot where her jawline met her neck, gently breaking the surface with his teeth.
A laugh rolled past the girl’s lips as she closed her eyes and pushed him away again, sitting up straight and ruffling up his hair.
“Nah, not really to be honest.” She smiled at him and they both leaned in closer, her hand in his neck as their lips locked.
Michael took a little bit of distance as he looked at the girl in front of him, soaking in the image of how she was this very second; her hair messy and her cheeks a dark shade of pink, lips swollen and eyes closed.
“You’re beautiful.” His words made her open her eyes as they smiled at each other.
“You’re not bad yourself either, Clifford.” Their lips met again in a loving kiss, his hands around her waist as she locked hers behind his neck, happiness radiating from both their bodies.
As they broke apart, she leaned her forehead against his and looked into his eyes. “Sing to me?” But Michael shook his head and fell onto his back.
Tears rolled down his cheeks as Michael put down his guitar, looking over the pond and closing his eyes again.
“I would’ve sung to you, Y/N.”
|| Back to the time you were lying next to me, I looked across and fell in love ||
It was 10:30 am when Michael’s eyes were introduced to the sunlight that day. His hand automatically searched for her body that was supposed to be next to his but he soon remembered that she wouldn’t be there.
A heavy sigh rolled past his lips as he rolled over to his other side, his eyes looking at the side of the bed that hadn’t been slept on in three weeks. The way her face looked when she was asleep still haunted him at night, he could still smell the faint scent of ever perfume that lingered on the pillow next to his.
Their bare legs were entwined as the messy haired girl laid next to the dark haired boy. They both were still sound asleep, exhausted yet fulfilled by last night’s activities. The sunlight slowly peaked through the curtain as Michael was the first of the two to open his eyes. A soft grunt left his mouth as he felt his muscles ache while he looked at the girl who was lying next to him. Her eyes were still closed as her breathing was steady, her mouth opened just a little. A smile crept onto Michael’s face as he wiggled his legs a little, memories of last night flooding back at him like a tidal wave. Every move she made, the way her body arched into his while his hips gently rocked into hers, it was a film playing over and over inside his head.
“Morning grumpy.” The soft whisper of Y/N’s voice brought Michael back to reality, his eyes locking with hers as his smile grew wider.
He nuzzled his face in to the crook of her neck while pulling her body closer to his.
“I’m not grumpy at all after last night.”
A giggle rolled past the girl’s lips, her cheeks turning a bright shade of red while she ran her fingers through her boyfriend’s hair. It had been the best night yet for the two of them, the actions of last night full of love and passion.
“Me either.”
The couple laid in bed for the rest of the day, lazy conversations about useless things, their laughter filling the room every now and then. Comfortable silences were filled with lazy kisses and making love once again, their bodies entwined most of the time.
It wasn’t until late that evening, when Y/N was fast asleep, that he looked over once again and studied the features of her face.
Until now he hadn’t been able to admit the feelings he’d felt for her, he just couldn’t do it just yet, but when he looked at her sleeping face and remembered everything they’d done that day, he knew.
He knew that he had fallen in love with his own definition of perfect.
|| You’re on the other side as this skyline splits in two, miles away from seeing you. But I can see the stars from America, I wondered do you see them too? ||
Four boys were stood in front of her stone one year after it had been put there. The four tall Australian boys who were followed by paparazzi before they had gotten here had smiled for the flashing cameras, but now they all stood still with tears in their eyes, the strange feeling of loss surfacing the longer they stood there. It had been hard on the three other boys as well, mostly because they’d seen the pretty girl on the photo in front of them as a sister, someone who’d never fail to make them smile. They could still recall the memories of her terrible singing in the morning when they were on tour, the morning rituals she always had to do still burnt in the back of their minds.
Michael slowly kneeled down on the grass in front of the grave, his hands on his face as he tried to blink the stinging tears away. His eyes focused on the photo of his girlfriend in front of him, her gorgeous smile smiling right at him as he tried to turn his lips into a small smile as well. The feeling of Luke’s warm hand on his shoulder dragged Michael’s attention away from the picture, his eyes now looking up at his three best mates, all of them with tears rolling down their cheeks, looking at the same picture.
“She wouldn’t want to see us cry.” Michael’s voice was thick with grief as he not only tried to calm his friends down but also himself, the tears in his eyes threatening to spill.
Time slowly passed by as they stood there, not saying a word but all thinking the same thing as they wiped away their tears. She had been too young, way too young to be taken away. She was supposed to live happily ever after with the guy of her dreams, marry the guy and have children with him, but fate took a weird turn.
After several minutes, the three boys had asked Michael if he wanted some time alone to give her his last goodbye.
As they slowly walked away, Michael crouched down again and let his tears fall freely.
“Hey baby… You’ve probably seen it but the boys were just here with me… They miss you terribly.” The words were stuck in his throat as he scratched his nose, deeply inhaling a shaky breath.
“It’s been quite a while but I’m still not over the fact you’re gone… But this is my final goodbye, Y/N. I really don’t want to do this because it means that I have to let you go but it’s what you would’ve wanted, you’d want me to move on…” He wiped away a few of his tears as he looked at the stars above him.
“But I want you to know that I will try to remember every little thing of you. You’re probably laughing up there because you know how easily I forget things but I’ll try… I will try to remember every little thing we did together..” His eyes turned back to the photo in front if him, a smile growing on his face as he picked it up, gently stroking the frame.
“I’ll forget things in time but I won’t ever forget you. I won’t ever forget our firsts, not ever. I will remember them and I will treasure them dearly. I want you to know that I love you so much and even though you’re so far away from me now, I’m sure you can see the same stars as me and I hope you can see me sitting here… I know you would’ve wanted me to move on, Y/N, so here’s what I’m doing…”
Michael looked at his girlfriend’s face for a few seconds before he pressed a kiss to the photo and put it down again, lighting the candle that was next to it before standing up.
As he walked away, he turned around for the last time and shot a quick glance to the bright yellow flame of the candle, it almost being as bright as the smile on the girls face on the phone next to it.
“I love you Y/N, please believe me when I say I won’t ever forget you.”